In these past few days we’ve been extremely busy with the works of the ministry and sadly, one of those days was taken by the funeral of a dear friend. Those of you who visited Malawi may have metĀ Biton, Stanley’s uncle, our friend, a good man who did some work even here at the mission house (the road up the hill being one of those).
For the past 1 month or so, Biton has been in and out of the hospital and several times we even took him to a private clinic. He had several severe complications, one of the most serious being a heart problem.
Although his passing, at the young age of 39, is still painful to all of us, we praise Lord for salvation and for heaven; Biton was a transformed man and his dedication for God was known to all. He has been an elder in his church for many years and a faithful man in his home and village.
Biton had a very important role in the community also. His sister, Stanley’s mother, is a chief in the village and he’s been helping her perform her duties. More than being an assistant to the chief, Biton was an uncle and, in southern Africa, uncles have very important roles within the “core” family or, what we would call in the West, the extended family. This institution is called “avanculism” and, in many ways, the uncle is almost like a “male mother” to children like Stanley and his siblings.
Biton working on the road.
An uncle in a Malawian family holds all the powers for the family’s decisions, including on the future of the children. They play crucial roles in marriage processes or other family issues. Many times, the children’s parents consult the uncles before making any decision on their children (Resource). They are called “Eni Mbumba“, meaning the owners of the family. More about the Malawi’s culture here: Malawi.
Based on Biton’s important role in the family, we can only try to understand the significant impact his death made. Nevertheless, as I mentioned, Biton was saved and he only moved to a better place where we, God’s children, will all go one day.
I want to share two stories regarding the time before Biton died, stories that show us God’s grace and love for His children as well as Biton’s faith in God.
The first story happened about 2 weeks before. Biton was in the hospital and his pastor visited him. It seems like Biton already knew his end is coming, so he asked his pastor to make arrangements for theĀ funeral. Among other things, he asked that people would sing two happy songs, dance and play the local, African drums. This, to me, shows a major shift in his mentality and I believe it has to do with the Gospel. Once you have eternity in mind, death is no longer a tragedy, but a mere gate to something much better. I believe Biton understood this reality and wanted people to have a moment of joy as he was going to experience joy in heaven. You see, Malawian funerals are, understandably, very sad and a lot of mourning is going on. No one would ever dare to smile, dance or do anything that resembles joy or happiness. Everyone attending is expected to put on a sad face, sit down with the head bowed, keep quiet and otherwise just be a part of the family’s sadness. A passerby hasĀ to remove hisĀ hat, get off the bicycle and walk slowly and solemnly.
The second story happened just 2 days before his death. He was now at home, bed-ridden and in a lot of pain. His family wanted to take him back to the hospital but Biton refused, arguing that there is nothing anyone can do anymore. He told them he will go soon but that everything is going to be ok. The next day he felt 100% better and even planned to come here at the mission house to visit us. Everyone was surprised how the previous day’s pains have miraculously disappeared overnight. What nobody understood is that was supposed to be “the calmĀ before the storm”; we have noticed, throughoutĀ the years, that before taking His loved one to heaven, God graciously grants a day or at least a few hours of pain-freeĀ and clear-minded state, maybe so he or sheĀ can say their goodbyes. Sure enough, the very next day, early in the morning, Biton moved to glory.
He left behind a wife and 5 children, the youngest being just a few months old.
“I tell you this, brothers: flesh and blood cannot inherit the kingdom of God, nor does the perishable inherit the imperishable. Behold! I tell you a mystery. We shall not all sleep, but we shall all be changed, in a moment, in the twinkling of an eye, at the last trumpet. For the trumpet will sound, and the dead will be raised imperishable, and we shall be changed. For this perishable body must put on the imperishable, and this mortal body must put on immortality. When the perishable puts on the imperishable, and the mortal puts on immortality, then shall come to pass the saying that is written:
āDeath is swallowed up in victory.
O death, where is your victory?
O death, where is your sting?āThe sting of death is sin, and the power of sin is the law. But thanks be to God, who gives us the victory through our Lord Jesus Christ.
Therefore, my beloved brothers, be steadfast, immovable, always abounding in the work of the Lord, knowing that in the Lord your labor is not in vain.“1 Corinthians 15:50-58
